When I read your post, I was struck by how familiar it sounded. I could put myself in your place and fit almost perfectly. It's so familar, in fact, that I don't think you're all those things. I don't know you, I can't say, but my guess is that you care so much and you try so hard, and yet you feel like all you're doing is hurting those you love and messing things up. Am I right? Take a moment to just sit and breathe. If you keep a journal or even if you just have paper laying around, write and keep writing about how you're feeling. Write what you think of yourself, then imagine you knew someone who thought those exact things about themselves—what would you say to them? If I'm right about you being a caring person, you probably would find reasons why that hypothetical person is not a hypocrite, not a waste, not a screwup. Write down what you would tell them. Now the depression will make you think that you are somehow different from this person, that you are inherently always at fault. But remember that this is the depression talking. It's your mood influencing your state of mind. notablackbarbie, it's not all your fault.

For everyone, many, many hugs, and I hope the waves of depression recede soon.

herethennow, how many medications have you been on? How long have you been in therapy? I've been seeing counsellors for years and I've been on seven or so different medications in the past year. You may have been through more, but I just wanted to say I understand how tough it is, but that you have to stay hopeful, keep going no matter how hard it is. I'm rooting for you. I'm rooting for everyone else here. For those that haven't had a good day in a long time, I hope you get at least a few hours of reprieve—I used to cherish those.