That must be extremely difficult for you. I am exactly like you - strangers in public transit open up to me and I do nothing to solicit their disclosures. I have been this way since very early on (middle school). And, it goes far beyond flirting, because elderly women would stop me to tell me about their concerns. The ability seems to be innate. I also read faces very well (I am sure you know what I mean - all those rich subtleties of facial expressions, slight grimacing, etc.), and, further, remember facial expressions years or decades after the conversations took place. I think it is an ability rather than a skill, which is why your husband does not get it - he lacks the ability.

What is worrisome is his blaming YOU. I have dated (dinners and light kisses) a very nice Asperger's guy (+he has depression, too) and am not dating him now just due to being overwhelmed with other things, but I plan to get together with him in August. So - he is worried about how he is perceived and whether he responds to social signals properly. He knows that he has this issue and is worried, and your husband is sort of the exact polar opposite - he is not worried, but is blaming his wife.