Quote:
Originally Posted by hamster-bamster
That must be extremely difficult for you. I am exactly like you - strangers in public transit open up to me and I do nothing to solicit their disclosures. I have been this way since very early on (middle school). And, it goes far beyond flirting, because elderly women would stop me to tell me about their concerns. The ability seems to be innate. I also read faces very well (I am sure you know what I mean - all those rich subtleties of facial expressions, slight grimacing, etc.), and, further, remember facial expressions years or decades after the conversations took place. I think it is an ability rather than a skill, which is why your husband does not get it - he lacks the ability.
What is worrisome is his blaming YOU. I have dated (dinners and light kisses) a very nice Asperger's guy (+he has depression, too) and am not dating him now just due to being overwhelmed with other things, but I plan to get together with him in August. So - he is worried about how he is perceived and whether he responds to social signals properly. He knows that he has this issue and is worried, and your husband is sort of the exact polar opposite - he is not worried, but is blaming his wife.
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OMG! You and I are a lot alike... I get exactly what you are saying. I get approached and have been told many times by my friends and by strangers that I'm just a very approachable person. And... I too can pick up on very subtle aspects of communication which leads me to be able to interpret a lot before it even happens.
Yea.. it bothers me that my husband blames me. It makes me feel crazy at times. The thing is, I think I can see right through him and what he's going to do before he does (mainly when it will negatively impact me) but I will never get him to admit any shortcomings on his end. Oh, I will get the casual.. "I'm sure I do this or that", you know the very generic admittance, but nothing of real substance. The interesting thing is, is that he sees how intuitive I am and how typically I'm well received by people and my friends. He acknowledges that and I guess admires it a little, but he refuses to admit that I know or understand him at all.
By the way... you are far better at expressing yourself than I am. It's like I know in my mind what I want to say and it makes sense, but I can't usually put it down in logical order to make sense...