well, i'd be silly to punish myself over the actions of a small fraction of the human beans of the world, wouldn't i?

i wish had the graphic of Jack Nicholson's face sticking through that door saying "I'm baaaaaaaaack".

i am doing so much better with my depression. my appt isn't til Dec 21 so i just took matters into my own hands and started dosing myself and found that 40mg of prozac, .05 mg xanax and then my 100 mg of darvocet (at bedtime) allows me to move forward, with a manageable degree of pain and enough interest in my surroundings that i'm cooking and eating a little bit and i even made some jewelry this evening for a certain little breadmaker that we all love.....

i'm not 100% at all but 50% is better than the 20 that i was struggling with. i still can't deal with having people around me (that means everyone) but i'll get there.

the animals have stepped up big time as support. and this morning at 4:30 a.m. a great horned owl woke me up, hooting from a tree in my yard!!!!! being part Indian, i take that as a sign that something is happening with me.... he sat and watched me and didn't appear to be the least bit threatened by my standing in the door.

so, to all of you jewels in my necklace of life......big tray of sour cream cookies will be delivered to your door at midnight.......xoxoxo pat