(((CaptainKirk))),
You will need therapy for this and you will need to "grieve" this loss. Your nightmares are "fear and confusion" based and you never found a place to put this loss and be able to "move on" with your life. Your brain is trying to find a way to "fix" something that was very traumatic and hard on you emotionally as you sleep at night.
(((Hugs)))
OE
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