Thanks for your answer. Just home now. I broke it off with him. It was the hardest breakup in my life (I know the "relationship" part was murky but we both called it a breakup), and the lenghtiest (12 hours of attempts to persuade me otherwise and other emotional stuff). I am exhausted :-( A lot of things were said, including the l word. I know he is hugely messed up and that doesn't change. Still, he is the kindest, most wonderful and warm hearted man and I don't think my love was misplaced and I can't bring myself to regret giving it. I really really really hope he gets help but I can't fix him. I love him very much but I guess I love me more. I am heartbroken :-(