I hope things start to get better for you soon. It is such an overwhelming cycle to get out of, I agree!
Even though you feel you may be taking more than giving right now, I think you are actually helping others at the same time. Reading your post reminds me that there are other people who often feel the way I do and struggle with similar issues, and that makes me feel a bit better and less alone. Posting can be give and take at the same time, so please keep posting