Hey. First off thank you for having the courage to open up. I do not think that you sound gay. Less them mister muscle man, masculine, maybe. That is ok. I have had many male friends who are less then masculine, sharp dressers, spend money on skin care and hair care. Beyond a shadow of a doubt they are male though and into women. Some have gotten married others have not.

As for the pron thing, well who wants to see a not so well hung guy in a pron. Not me. I like to see large dudes, and heavy chested girls, but that doesn't make me lesbian. The naked body is an art form. Pretty is pretty regardless of your sexual orientation.

As for the dressing like a female, or fantasizing about being female. I don't know. Sounds a little out of tradition. But who says sexuality has to follow tradition. You can like what you like. Just like a female liking football or NASCAR. Who says it is not ok. It is ok. It is what you like.

If you are attracted to females, and you prefer to have sex with females and the thoughts or having sex w/ males is repulsive then to me that sounds like your answer. You are not gay, you just have fantasies and preferences that are outside of the norm. And again there is noting wrong with that. Take a look around in this forum and see if there is anything else about fantasies and fetishes. It sounds more to me like you are dealing with a fetish. Have you tried putting this in the males only forum. You might get more answers there from more males.

Hope you find the answers you looking for here.