I can relate with almost everything you've said, especially with isolating yourself and your mother being harsh on you with a lot of things.

Are you currently taking any meds? If so maybe it's time to go back to the drawing table and figure out what else might be able to help you better, and if not it may be a benefit to look into finding a psychiatrist because it definitely sounds like you're struggling with some emotions and things that are out of your control. It also sounds like you could benefit greatly from having a therapist to talk things out with, mine has definitely helped me a lot to come up with different coping mechanisms and things that I can do to help me through different situations.

Just from my personal experiences even if it is a very difficult thing to do it almost always makes things better to be honest with the people around you. My mother was always hard on me too because she never understood what was going on with me and I was scared to open up to her too - but once I did and she saw how much I was struggling and I let her know that I was having a difficult time with a lot of things - it wasn't nearly as bad as imagined and it felt much better just to communicate and be open about things and she was so much more understanding once I explained things to her directly. She's your Mom so even if she's harsh on you sometimes she is always gonna love you no matter what. Dont forget that it never hurts to ask for a little bit of help if you need it!

Hang in there!! You're not alone!