Thinking about being 36 years old, a waitress for the same company for 11 years, & living day to day in a cold world I have to wonder. Did I take a wrong turn? Or is my brain incapable of letting me succeed. Am I just a helpless victim of a dabilitating mental illness, or did I just mess things up? Once upon a time I had a future. Now the only thing I have to strive for is a disability check. Could I have been something greater? Could I have been anything else than who I am? It's just like 20 years passed & I'm wondering what the Hell happened. I guess people all have a part in the world, I'm frightened that mine is destined to be a tragedy. Who am I? Why am I this way? Where's my future? I feel cheated.