I am not coping well at all, It all started with the anniversary of my mothers death (1 year) It all brings back so many memories, I know that I am in meltdown it has taken me 5 days to write this post but things are getting worse for me and I feel like I can't cope with these feelings any more.

I phoned my nurse on Friday as she says to call her if I feel that I am in crisis she hasn't called me back yet and now I feel stupid, What is annoying though I never ask for help and when I do this happens.

I am crying a lot then it turns into anger then I self harm then I have suicidal thoughts, I am constantly looking at medication to take and thinking "JUST DO IT" I don't know what is stopping me.