Hello all. I have never been diagnosed, but judging from the articles I've read I may be suffering from depression. I intend to get myself checked one day.

I've been through a breakup since end of last year. I was a wreck during the first few months but eventually I have got slightly better. Sadly it was only temporary. Unfortunately this depression is coming back to me lately and this time it is much worse. Sometimes when I loose control of my anger I would just hit myself really hard. It's one of the few ways for me to let out the anger. It's either that or distract myself with shows or books these days. I mostly spend time alone in my room.

The come back of my sadness made me think that there might be more to this than just a typical 'after-breakup' feeling.

It's silly that I still love that person who decided to kick me out of his life. It's been more or less half a year since the breakup and he is still on my mind always.

I plan to meet up with a specialist soon. I had proposed this idea to my relative but another one of them just said that I'm being "Ridiculous!". Talking to them doesn't work either, since both sides share different views that could lead us into arguments. I feel like nobody truly understands my condition at all. I feel really destroyed inside.

At times I wish I could be like some girls; Moving on by getting themselves a new guy by the first week of the breakup. A typical 'Switching boyfriends = changing clothes' situation, as some would call it. But I'm just not like that. It's not me.