I am so sorry TI, I think it is important you see a doctor and get some help for yourself first.
It sounds like your mom really is not, for now, the person she once was for you; her grief has taken a destructive path-----I don't know what you can do about that (?is there any other adult that you could talk to who knows her and might be able to help her "see" how dangerous what she is doing is for herself and her children?)-----
In time things may get better but you can't wait. ((((hugs)))).