I have never stated that I don't want my belief criticized. I welcome criticism on any of my beliefs if there are any criticisms to be brought. In fact, if you felt I held a belief wrongly and did not level criticism against it, I would consider it to be an insult. Withholding criticism is the way people treat children and idiots. To not criticize my beliefs if you thought they were wrong would be patronizing, condescending, and offensive to me.

I already stated I don't judge poly-amorous, polygamy or open relationships as long as all are consenting and aware. Its not for me though. I have no idea why you're defending your belief when I've been the most reasonable person on this thread. At this point I feel you're nit-picking. I don't think I should have to defend my own beliefs.

This is an argument I hear often, but I don't buy it. I don't buy it because if your partner lied to you about something you didn't care about very much, you likely wouldn't be very upset by it. If you partner told you his great grandmother was named Gertrude but then you found out that his great grandmother was actually named Esther and he knew this all along but simply lied about her name, would you end the relationship over this? Would you be very upset about it at all. Maybe, maybe you might be slightly annoyed by the intentional deceit. I suspect that most people, however, just simply wouldn't care at all about this lie. The argument that it is wrong because it's deceit doesn't hold water. In order to be upset about the deceit, you have to care about the act in the first place. Then you can be upset about the deceit to hide the act on top of that. But you are not primarily upset about the deceit. You are primarily upset about the act.

Telling white lies is nothing compared to sleeping with another person. Women especially connect emotionally with sex. If I assume my partners faithful and he's not - that's a big deceit. I'd be upset about the deceit and the act.

This is an after-the-fact reason to rationalize sexual exclusivity. If you can honestly tell me that you wouldn't mind having an open relationship if all STD's were cured and your partner was sterile, then we can talk about this, but it's a pointless conversation unless you can do that because it's not the real reason.

Well that's my opinion.

The only reason I can think of that something would be bad or wrong is if it hurts someone else. things that actually hurt you do so regardless of whether or not you know they are happening. If your partner poisons your food a little each day, but you don't suspect it, then you are still being harmed regardless of your knowledge or lack of knowledge. If your partner steals money from you but you never find out, you were still harmed regardless of the fact that you never find out. These things are actually harmful. It has nothing to do with "living in reality" or not. Things that are actually harmful to you are things that you need to find out about in order to stop being harmed. "Cheating" however is something that doesn't harm you at all unless you find out about it. Indeed the most wrong thing the cheater could do is tell you about the cheating because that actually harms you. you don't see anything fishy about a belief that something is wrong when it doesn't actually harm you unless you know about it?