I appreciate everyone's comments. Eskielover, I am so sorry that you had to go through that. I understand that your situation isn't exactly the same as mine, but it's the same in the sense that you were betrayed by someone who you loved, and trusted. Someone who made promises to you when you were married. It's horrible to think you know and trust someone so completely, only to find out that they aren't exactly who you thought they were. I NEVER thought my husband to be a "one night stand" type, let alone that he would cheat on me.

Let me give you all an update. I called him. I told him exactly how I was feeling. He told me that he was giving me the space he knew I needed. He said he's taken the time away from each other to reflect on himself. About why he did it, why he didn't come clean about it sooner. He said that our whole marriage has been so hard for him. Watching me go through what I was going through (PTSD), and feeling useless to help. He said that when I started going through therapy (1 year ago), and seeing the positive changes in me and our marriage, he felt he HAD to come clean about it because we were starting a whole new life together, and he wanted that new life to begin with nothing standing in the way. He has been in therapy himself now for 1 month. He wants to start marriage counceling with me too, but for the time being, he wants to go alone.

I am so glad that I've talked to him now. I'm still so, so hurt, but at least now I know where he's coming from. Yes, I still would have liked for him to come to me sooner. It would have made me feel just a little better. Like he really loved me and didn't want to lose me. The no contact for 2 months was really starting to make me question myself.

For now, we are just going to take it slow. He'll remain on his own, and I on mine. When he's ready to move on to couples therapy, I'll be here. There's so much more we need to work on other than the affair. The lack of communication in our relationship is, needless to say, a huge factor. I

I can't stress enough now how important communication is in relationships. I know how hard it is to let down your guard and your ego. But truly, there is no other way. This has been such a huge learning experience for me. I hope others can learn from this too.