I really thought I wouldmake it the whole day without hurting myself, but no. I triedto follow the plan I had set up with my therapist, but I only made it half way through. I did not make it to the library because my back was hurting from lifting boxes all morning. So I took a Lortab and took a nap. When I woke up my back was okay, but I wasn't feeling to up. I just wanted the feeling to go away so I cut myself three times. The thing is it only helped for a few minutes then I was hurting again.

I am so stupid to think one: that I am strong enough to make it through aday alone, two: that cutting would help and three: I am just a stupid person. I hate myself for this. Why can't I just stay safe?

This evening is another challenge. I am pretty much by myself again. What can I do?