Quote:
Originally Posted by winter4me
One place to start may be with a lawyer, for YOU, usually you can get a first meeting/assessment of the situation without paying. After that, if you decide to fight for yourself, take money from the joint account and open Your Own account. ((If you need to go to a safe house/shelter during this time do so))----He really is not going to change no matter what you do, in fact, trying to "appease" him will likely escalate the situation as he seems to feed off of your fear and dependence. I am so sorry----you really have to take action to get out of this unless you are willing to put up with being abused for the rest of your time with this man. take care. There are obviously people here who have been in your situation and may be able to give some helpful advice. My heart goes out to you.
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The only things that stopped me from consulting a lawyer in the past was the fact that I have NO money to pay a lawyer. And even the cheapest one would cost thousands of dollars! I have to get a job and save up money. As for taking money from the joint account, I dare not do that for now since I'm sure that he'll take my name of the account if I do that anytime soon!
Each time that I withdrew money w/o his consent, he was livid! I could clean out the account when I decided to leave him. If that time comes, I'll have to be 100% ready to leave with a job, savings, and a place to go. I have no one to rely on financially. No one will even let me stay at their place for a night! One friend who helped me out once told me that she told her father about the time that I stayed at her place a few days after he scared me so bad that I refused to be around him.
He knocked over the kitty tower and broke a couple of things which was unlike him. I didn't wait for things to get worse. I was scared that me might end up hitting me then! I stayed there for 4 or 5 days at her house. After she told her dad, he told her not to get involved although since my husband could come after her too. It's not her house, it's his, so she had to listen to him although he doesn't live there anymore.