Thinking of you. I've been in your shoes and we tried marriage counseling. He wouldn't own up to any of his issues...he felt everything was my fault because of my bipolar and other mental issues. It is important that our partners accept us for who we are - you are not your illness. I ultimately divorced after being married many years. It's been a big life transition but it's great to no longer be judged or be "conditionally loved." Wishing you the best. Do therapy for you regardless of whether he will try couples counseling. Take care.