Am sorry you feel bad about your Dad... but in the eyes of the law, he broke the law - and am sorry, folk should be punished. Seriously, this isn't your fault.

Your parents have been physically abusive and I daresay mentally abusive. The way you say that you deserve it etc shows me they've been controlling you for a long time and you're worn down.

I do hope, I really do hope that you will seek some good therapy soon. Please please break this pattern you're in. 16, wow, you should be having fun now, starting to explore the world out there, not dealing with abuse. It makes me so sad that you're going though all this, and even more so when you think the abuse is the correct way to handle you. It's not, it never will be and you deserve so much more kindness.

Please, for your future, for your future kids, your g/f, get some help. This abuse is so not your fault, and try too to get some better help with your bipolar. With help and effort you can be happy and much much calmer. Making mistakes in the past doesn't have to mean you always will do if you're strong enough to reach out.

Big hugs.