I will have to say that this situation is difficult and complex, there cannot be a cut and dry solution...it will not work. I think ultimately this is all leaning back on your husband. You cannot be his savior. He has to choose what/where he needs to go in life. It would be devasting to break up a family over a sexual desire, shallow and stupid. I would make that clear to him. If he decides he is gay, or even bi sexual, there are things you could possibly work out to keep him satisfied if you're willing to do that.

If it were me I would give him a certain amount of time to make up his mind. I would say you deal with your crises and when you figure it out I will be here. You cannot pressure him into swaying your way or to make the decision quickly. If it's done in that manner it will be done incorrectly, he would be unsatisfied and possibly go behind your back to find what it is he is seeking.

Be clear that he can come to you with anything, tell him you would not loose respect for him as long as he is honest.

I hope it all works out for you and your husband, I really do.