Depression isn't weakness. It's a disease with symptoms that can be recognized by a professional psych person. So the first thing to do is recognize your feelings as part of a disease so you can be free of shame and guilt. You can do that without having to be active. If you haven't already read the information on this forum and try to get a little distance from the the despair. If you can start doing that today you will have been very pro-active and courageous. Then you can think about what you want in your life and figure out how to get it.
Good luck