Thank you all who responded, I was deeply touched.

I know the first house was representative of my childhood.
All the glitter and gold held no value for me, it was a house of horror.
The only source of affection came from the man outside who was untouchable.

This man is one of 2 men my bio father and the man of the 2nd dream is who I am with now. ( a mix )

The second house is a representative of a house I shared with my daughter and her stepdad, this house is dead, dusty, and the cobwebs for 12 years.
This man is full of sadness that I can't repair. (his mother was murdered when he was 8 and his dad died in the house of lung cancer when he was 17.)
Both his parents were beautiful people and he feels like it is still "their house"
for him to maintain and all the furnishings in honor of them.
He is a good man, a loyal and trustworthy man who was a wonderful step dad, like two ducks in the pond they were.
Until depression set in and he would pace back and forth saying "I was meant to be alone." Emotional and physical withdrawal set in and after 2 years I moved out.

At that time the house at the stop sign was for sale, pre foreclosure, I bought it to be close to f. parents who had come back apologizing for their misdeeds, manipulating me with their money. I am not for sale. I never left the 2nd man, we remained to best friends and still love oneanother and today communicate well/better than before. I stay with him on weekends. ( he is untouchable )

So I am responsible for my own happiness and secretly questioning what I want. I know you cant have everything but I am unhappy were I am now.
My own house has no energy and I want to move, but ....?