I keep telling myself that this will pass. It always does, eventually. Can't seem to give a care about anything tonight.
I tried to "rewind" my day & week and there is nothing that could have triggered it.
I don't get to see my T for another week and I don't know if I can keep from doing anything harmful.
I know that the pain from it will only last a while, but it's more the release that I desire.
I really really really hate feeling like this. I hate myself more than anyone in my life even knows.
in my mind is frustrating. I am so tired, but can't sleep. I'm just sooooo tired of trying.
BJ