Suicidal ideation all this past week. Ugh! Not that I'd do it, but I gotta get in a better place. Don't wanna be in this space, where I can't appreciate who/what I have to be thankful for. Trying, but my mind won't get with it. Holding on to my hopes for Monday. If I hadn't been out of town Thursday, I coulda seen my pdoc. Monday it is, need to get back on my med. I'll be ok, but please hurry, Monday.