Started 50 lamictal last night, and what a concept to wake up and feel a sense of calm. I got up when I wanted to get up, and not when my body "forced" me to get up because I felt uncontrollably compelled. I want more of that!

The past 2 days have been bad with depression/lethargy hitting in the afternoon/eves though - - but with a tinge of anger mixed in.

I so desperately want to be stable again. I told myself August was going to be potentially rough (as I work up on lamictal). I just need to keep reminding myself that I'm not even on a therapeutic dose and to be PATIENT. I have no choice but to ride this storm out and am trying to have faith that THINGS WILL GET BETTER.