I am sorry that you have gone through all of this. Props for seeking out T and going- it can be a great, safe place to start to unravel it all. Don't worry if you feel like you are starting to spin...there is a lot to your story, some of which you will find overlaps/connections, others will just seem to be opening up a can of worms you have no idea how to get rid of. Stick with it, and we are always here to listen and bounce things off of. It's very confusing, painful, anxiety-producing, but in the end, you can come out on top and be changed for the better. Will love to hear of your progress through it all. (hugs)