Sometimes a good place to start is here. Your mother is not speaking in truths, sometimes a good motivator is showing yourself and your mother just how wrong these statements are. I hope you know deep down that these things she says are false and only a design to keep you controlled. You are the one who gets to decide these things and only you.

It's not that you will never survive without her, it's that it is amazing you survived WITH her! Maybe she knows that too, and that might be scary for her. After all that is a testament to your own strength.