You do sound a little more upbeat on this last post, Motown Johnny, than on the first! Glad to see this. And clearly, you've gotten some great advice and support in this thread. Just keep moving forward and love yourself as you would a best friend. I'm currently looking for more research, reading on this subject, as I struggle with it, too. Sometimes don't cut myself enuff slack. But if you are results oriented at times, you can usu see the value of accepting yourself where you are and continuing to move forward. I do wish you the very best!!!!