The last couple of days have been rough for me. I'm stuck in a state of nothingness. Usually when I'm down, I try hard to think of something to make me feel like I want to keep going, but lately nothing works. I can't even make myself do the littlest things. I'm afraid my mind and body is slowly starting to shut down. I don't want to sleep, I don't want to be awake, I don't want to talk, I hardly want to type this right now, but I'm forcing myself (in hopes it might make me feel better). I've been completely numb to emotional feelings lately, but today I've been fighting to hold back tears that somehow want to come out. The numbness feels awkward and wrong, but I would choose it over actual emotional pain anyday.