Thanks to all of you for your responses. I guess I just feel lost because I'm not good at keeping friends and, for whatever reason, losing this one has hurt more than losing someone I was actually in a romantic relationship with.

I suppose a part of me wants to protect her. Looking back at some of my old girlfriends, I tend to find myself drawn towards women in bad relationships I guess. My mother was in an abusive relationship when I was growing up and maybe that just makes me unconsciously seek out people who need help. Even though I just started talking to her to help with tech problems and didn't know anything of her relationship until after we started talking regularly.

A part of me wonders if the whole relationship was a lie or wonders what parts of it were true and what parts were lies. I know it's no good trying to solve that riddle.