I've never emailed my therapist about dying -except for one other time in the 2 years I've seen her. Well, this time- it's been a few weeks and she never responded. Sometimes, she responds and sometimes she doesn't but, this one was about how much I wanted to die and how mad I am that I have to stay around just to not devestate other people. Literally, that's the only reason I'm still here.. I don't want anyone upset if I died. I've wanted to die for three years now and I guess it doesn't make a difference to my therapist if I did because she couldn't even take the time to respond. It's funny friends will take a post like this as seeking attention but, if I died- they be all like, "Jazzy, was one of the best people I know." -Ain't that twisted. People are flaky. Don't get me wrong though, I'm pretty much a functioning depressed person. I do a lot. Work, go to school, starting my own business, hang out with people etc. I have good, blessed days all the time- but, for the most part, if I was taken out, idk if it would bother me that much and I think about death all the time.