It almost sounds as if you're having a reaction to your medication. Sometimes they can make depression worse. Especially with the cutting, you're essentially "self-medicating". Injury releases endorphins and adrenaline to give you the feeling you're mentioning.

I understand the alone feeling, especially if your family isn't noticing your marks. There is a mental phenom ... phomem ... a mental action where people will see someone, know who they are and then their mind fills in the details so they don't see changes. Many a husband has gotten in trouble for not noticing their wife's new haircut because of this.

What I'm saying is that it may not be them ignoring you so much as they are comfortable with you and are filling in your details. Not actually seeing the marks. Help them out and show them, none of us wants your feelings to get worse.