Hamster-Bamster is dead right. They should totally elope.

Weddings are stressful, time consuming and getting to be extremely expensive. It seems like all the time someone is talking about how their wedding flopped or whatnot. A wedding is a ceremony it isn't the marriage.

On the other hand ... unless someone gets eaten by a rogue mutant manatee, the honeymoon (see, I'm winking *wink, wink*) is fun and relaxing. They should spend their money on a nice honeymoon (not something extravagant like hiking in the Himalayas, but something nice). They will enjoy it, save the hassle and a ton of money and be just as married.

As for the house, there's plenty of predatory lending. The banks want to loan everyone waaaay more than they can actually pay. The higher the loan, the more they make. The agent is the same way, the more expensive the house, the more money they make. Neither is in the business of making sure a new couple has a comfortable life and will try to talk them into anything. I know she's smarter than that, don't let her fall for what the banks and agents are trying to sell them.

Good luck, it's a rough time for a parent.