BrokenWings,
if you have to give something up, give up the self harm. Smoke "Blue" or one of those other electric cigarettes. I was never a smoker, so I don't know much about the new smokeless cigarettes.

If your medication was helping, stay on it. Unless it is causing major problems with your functioning, its better than self harm. Self harm is addictive, (believe me, i did it for years and years), and becomes all you think about.

Everyone makes mistakes, so don't beat yourself up for hurting yourself again. just remember how bad it is making you feel now. SI is not a cure for anything. It is a symptom of an illness, just like a sore throat is a symptom of strep throat. You need to find out why you cut and then take steps to find other outlets. If you have a therapist, call him or her and let them know what happened. SI doesn't seem that terrible when you are in the middle of it, but the physical and emotional scars you will get from it will last for years.

Sam2