The reference to knight armor's being like props was facetious. In this story, nobody - nobody, neither the queen nor the knight - plays any roles. Both are being authentically themselves.

I am not saying that role playing is bad, though. I am just pointing out that the story was not about that.

Plus, back to OP...

...you count the number of times you orgasmed before your wife did with pride, as one would share an achievement...

...if I were your wife, I would be seriously - seriously! - worried that you did not love me. Liked me - sure, respected me - sure, treated me well - sure, and all the rest of that. But did not love me with passion.

This is because a man who loves a woman passionately often cannot restrain himself in order to not to come before she does. A man who loves a woman passionately cannot take his hands off her...and, to continue this thought, cannot "censor" himself enough not to come before she does.

Just saying that what looks like a big accomplishment to YOU might be worrisome to HER.