sigh....this is the most depressed and rejected I've felt in a while. Me and my sister (i'll call her JM) have always been on different wavelengths, but this week she totally went off on me.
I understand that I do often cancel plans with her and other friends due to my health issues, I'm always sick, have a migraine, or sleep issues. I feel bad about it, but my friends and other family understand. She doesn't, even though she has more mild symptoms of depression and stuff.
She says I cancel "99%" of our plans which is a complete exaggeration. JM is off her meds right now, because she's trying to get pregnant. But if she's stressed, why wouldn't she want to talk to me? I'm always emotionally there for her, even if not in person. When she had a bad night and wanted to crash at my place, I offered to come pick her up. She'd never do that for me. I was feeling extremely desperate one night and called her, and she said she was too busy or tired to talk. She's never really been there for me when I needed her, and I'm the one that is putting up with her.
She also said we can't have an "adult conversation" because I always end up crying. Well excuse me for being emotional when someone hurts my feelings and berates me! I have bipolar disorder and BPD, so my mood swings are all over the place anyway. She's a nurse practitioner, you might think she'd understand a little. I feel depressed being around her, she's very critical and puts me and my mom down all the time
She literally said she "wouldn't put up with me if I wasn't her sister". to that I replied well don't bother then. I'm not wasting my time with someone who thinks its a chore to hang out with me! I have a lot more friends than her, so I think i'm probably a much more likeable person. She also told me a couple years ago that I was the worst bridemaid ever, despite me doing everything she asked and more (except missing one dress fitting). I don't know what to do, as we attend the same church, have some mutual friends, and will have to see each other sometime soon.
Truth is, I don't want to see or talk to her for a VERY long time, if ever.
She's not worth me even being upset about, but I can't help being hurt I'm very sensitive.
Sorry for the extra-long message, needed to rant, and ask if anyone has any advice??
Thanks