Quote:
Originally Posted by hamster-bamster
What about being in love with a person who does not share your views on sex? Who wants to be loved sexually?
Do you see the difference between being loved sexually and being used in a sexual way?
When you say that you would not want to use your hypothetical lover in a sexual way, you are not even considering their perspective. From their perspective, possibly, you would not be USING THEM IN A SEXUAL WAY but LOVING THEM IN A SEXUAL WAY. Do they get to have a say? Or, do you determine everything just by thinking about your perspective?
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The idea scares me and I'm afraid I don't really have an answer. It's for this very reason that I have always either made an effort to avoid anyone who seemed interested in me or avoid anyone I was interested in myself. I cannot express affection in a sexual way, but at the same time I do understand and accept that most people would want sex in the light you're talking about.
I've avoided relationships my whole life because I don't want to be backed into a corner where I would have to choose between doing something I'd feel terrible about for the sake of a hypothetical partner or being a selfish jerk for sticking to my own morals.