So very sad you & your children are going thru this.
Just throwing this out there--is there a possibility of some co-dependence keeping a lot of this circuling round & round?
We're not professionals but maybe something to be brought up in therapy.
Know you love her or love who she was, but agree you can't fix her.
Don't know ages of your kids but they are affected by this turmoil.
They may seem resilient now but this will shape who they are, now & in the future.
Only wish you the best in this difficult journey.