cjs, you have described my life. Currently I'm living with my parents. I can barely leave the house and I'm in the middle of applying for disability. I've tried a zillion meds too--right now I'm on 2 antipsychotics and 2 mood stabilizers--they are helping but I wish they could help me more. I have an online part time job that is a life savior for me--gives me enough money for meds and food. The only reason I can keep it is because of flexible hours and I don't have to leave my house or talk to anyone. When I became suicidal I had to go to the hospital...no matter what--don't give up--keep doing whatever you can do to make it through the day.....you do matter.....D.