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Originally Posted by The Alchemist
Alright, so I'm now going onto about year number 3 of dealing with my OCD habits/rituals/thoughts and my doctor finally recommended I see a therapist as my daily life is greatly hindered with my current OCD behavior. I've tried pretty much every medication under the sun with a little help from clomipramine but I'd still say my OCD is around a level 8-9 out of 10 on degree of severity.
My main concern is coping with the idea (or possibly fact) that this damn mental condition will never go away and it's how I'm going to live the rest of my life. Im in my early 20s and the thought of dealing with this from here on out is daunting, to say the least.
I'm not seeking sympathy because it doesn't do much for anything or anybody at the end of the day (and I dont mean to sound conceited by saying that). I more looking for how others on here handle/cope with this outlook?
I feel like I have a split brain, with one side of it being rational and knowing that my OCD behaviors are ridiculous and rather baseless, and then I have my OCD half that carries out all my odd, nonsensical behaviors. It's just so damn hard to control that side of my brain.
It's to the point where I'm wondering if I should consider electrotherapy (though I know that's only reserved for very serious cases, but at this point if the way Im living isn't considered "severely hindered" I feel beyond sorry for those who are).
Anyway, I'm just sort of venting and felt like getting some of my feelings out there because I have few people to talk to about this side of myself and it gets bottled up inside me.
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Hey! I also suffer from OCD, and mine has varied in its intensity due to the things that I have been doing. There were times when I was afraid of going alone to some place due to fear that I would hurt someone without knowing it, or I was afraid to drive due to fear that I'd run someone over without knowing it. I've also been severely afraid of catching a disease like rabies from the environment and dying a horrible death to the point that I was afraid of ever getting close to animals. I have had an obsession about the stove, and I have to check it multiple times during the night, just to make sure. Heck, I've dealt with many of these, but many still affect me. I don't know much about you to be able to help you more, but I can say that it matters whether you had your OCD from when you were a child (5-10 years old) or it started later. Also has it increased in intensity as time goes, or has it gone better? I'm also on medication currently, but medication alone is never enough. Meditation and prayer greatly help.
As for whether you'll have to live your entire life with OCD, I don't think you will. But you need to find the cause of your OCD and deal with it! And you are the only one who can find it, you are the only one who can experience reality the way you do. So you have to find the cause of your OCD... As for a way of dealing with the thoughts, what I try to do is have a very shortsighted look at the future. Only a step ahead... not more. This way I stay close to the present and I can be happy. For example, I still have obsessions about catching rabies and dying. But I know that for certain I won't die today. So instead of thinking about it more, I decide to think and look forward to dinner tonight when I will get to enjoy some food and some quality time with my family. God bless, have hope, and never give up! Remember that there's always a way, even when there seems to be none!
I recommend you try meditation and prayer. Look up mindfulness meditation! Also try the short-sighted thinking that I was telling you about for a little!