This is going to sound so weird but I was about to cut not long ago when I saw my arm… now I’ve seen my arm before obviously, but I don’t know… it’s as if I’ve only ever looked and never *seen*

I knew it was covered in scars… I mean I have been cutting for 10 years and burning for 8, not to mention the marks my fathers “punishments” have left… but I don’t think I’ve ever really noticed just how bad my arm is… seriously there is so little normal skin… it’s just a mass of scars and needle marks (drug use I’m sorry to say…). The other arm is just as bad… in fact I don’t have much not scared skin anywhere…

Even if I do manage my current bid to stop I am going to be scared forever… why the hell did I not notice this sooner??? How could I just not have seen…