Sometimes, fantasies, need to remain just that, fantasies. Bringing a third party or another couple into the mix, and you aren't comfortable, that doesn't sound fair that he's pressuring you to be into such a type of relationship.
Personally, when involved with someone, the very idea of seeing them, sleep with someone else(as would happen in a three some) or have them see me sleeping with someone, or just knowing that instead of with me, he's with the other couple and vice versa, would drive me stark raving mad!! Literally!! Where's the trust? Honor?
I mean, it's not what you want. I hear you, about having second thoughts about proceeding further into marriage.
What's next, cheating around, because you won't fulfill this 'need' of his, to have you and someone else, too?
Open relationships, aren't for everyone. Certainly, not for me, either!
Quote:
Originally Posted by raena
Okay, so I have a big issue right now. My fiance and I have been together for three years and I always knew he was more adventurous than I was and it never really bothered me until he started wanting to fulfill his fantasies....
He keeps talking about wanting to TRY an open relationship where we can be with other people etc. I am not one for that idea, perhaps its because I am old fashioned I don't know. My brain has it glued to my being that I can NOT sexually be with more than one person at a time. This is causing a lot of stress and drama at home needless to say. He doesnt want to give up his WANTS and I don't want to betray what my head believes is right. I attempted it once to make him happy so he would shut up. And I regretted it the whole time and hated myself for it after.
I told him this and he says he knows that I won't change my mind, yet he continuously tries to make me change my mind about it! I am not comfortable with the idea, but I don't want him to be miserable not fulfilling these hopes and dreams that I apparently can't fulfill..... (honestly it makes me feel like crap that I am not enough.....) but I get it, he needs more. We almost broke up the other night because of this, and I don't want that because besides the sexual issues between us our relationship is great! I just don't know what to do.....  Help!?
(I hope this is the right spot for this.... if not let me know..) |