I'm sorry you are feeling so low at this time, and sorry to hear that you OD'd. I know how strong those urges are, especially to do more than just cut to release. It's tough. I don't know what more I can say about your circumstance (since I don't know you personally of course and thus can't tell you it will all be alright) but I can say that I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Try to be safe.