My mind is all over the place right now. I've been almost obsessively ( at least a few times a day) reading threads on PC--all different categories--posting a couple of times. I'm not sure what I'm looking for. Is this unhealthy? Should I stop?

I'm overwhelmed by all the experiences people post about therapy. Having never been, I think I'm trying to grasp what it's all about since I can't get myself to go (yup, posted about that). Am I just trying to live through other's stories?

People's relationship issues are fascinating to me. So many things I can relate to; so many things that are confusing or beyond my comprehension. I have figured out so many things but at the same time am desperately missing something in my own relationships. Is it helping me to read so much?

I want to post more things; more questions I have, but there is too much to say and too many conflicting emotions. Some days are good, some are bad. If I post when I'm bad, then it would look silly when I post something good.

I am feeling sad but am trying my best to do something about it. I went out with friends last night because that's what I'm supposed to do. I would have preferred to stay home. It was enjoyable, but I felt like I had to try hard to be social.

I'm setting up times to exercise with other people because I know that should be good. I don't want to go, but I will.

I'm leaving on vacation soon and the panic has now set in. No laundry done, not done with planning. I don't want to go and would rather stay home. But I'll go because it should be good for me.

So, the rambling me asks if I should get off the computer, stop reading threads, get on with life? Maybe the thread reading is not allowing me to focus on my real life.

Ugh! This makes no sense but I'll post and leave it at that.