I found the blog "stop walking on eggshells" on psychology today to be very useful when I was first coming to terms with my BPD and NPD traits. There's a good number of posts on there about how both disorders are rooted in shame.

I don't have a personality disorder diagnosis but I've not responded terrible well to treatment for depression or addiction. I know that I have plenty of NPD and BPD traits and I strongly feel that it's those that I need to address now. I'm re-starting therapy on the NHS now and I'm really hopeful about where that will go now that I've had this insight into myself and crucially now that I'm feeling more confident about speaking up about which treatments work for me and which don't.