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Originally Posted by neutrino
1. Is it normal to feel exhausted and even quite depressed after a session? So far I've left the sessions feeling exhausted because of the sessions being very psychologically challenging. I've also felt very scared and low afterwards.
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Yes. Most people feel like that. It can be quite lonely to open yourself up, and then leave. Scary even. A lot of people have a difficult time with the "in between", I always tried to compartmentalize therapy, I'd allot a certain time each day to ruminate and dwell on a session, but distract myself the rest of the time. I just couldn't be "in my head" all the time, it was too much for me.
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Originally Posted by neutrino
2. I'm afraid of pretty much everything and so far I haven't even been able to do the "small" and relatively "easy" exposures the therapist has asked me to do. Do you reckon it's possible that he'll give up on me if I don't do what he asks me to? I think I need to take things slow and I need my therapist to be patient with me. I'm afraid he thinks I'm annoying for saying no to the exposures he's suggested so far.
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I think it's okay to ask him for reassurance. Even handing him these questions would be huge. The only one that knows his level of patience is him.
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Originally Posted by neutrino
3. This might seem weird but I've lived with depression and anxiety disorders for so long it's like they're a part of me. I don't know who I am without them. That + me being very scared of changes and uncertainty makes me very anxious about therapy in general (though I want to be in therapy). What if I become "a different person"? What if I lose my sense of self? Could that happen?
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You will become different, but it's a gradual process. No one is going to wave their magic wand and turn you into a Newt. lol. We all fear change, that's normal, but change isn't always a bad thing.