I owed both my brother and sister money and it caused our relationship to deteriorate. My brother offered to loan me the money but I asked to borrow from my sister. Both have helped me out in the past because I have struggled all of my life financially and in every other way. That being said, I already was feeling like crap to have to need them again but it was necessary. I was going through alot of different problems one after the other and I was having financial difficulties and I started off paying them back a little each month and then stopped because my BF stopped working and I didn't have any extra to give. Then I got diagnosed with an illness and had surgery for another illness, it was a mess. The bottom line is they didn't really care, they wanted their money. My brother told me so in an email when I had just told him all of the difficulties I was going through and was very depressed. So I started to pay them both back. Every time I got paid I paid them something even if it was 5 dollars until it was finished. I kept receipts and wrote down everything so I would have proof. It took 2 years but I did it. Now we barely speak. I spent Thanksgiving alone and I will be Spending Christmas alone. I will never ask for or accept money or help from them again. I understand your hurt and pain. You want to pay her back but you don't have it at the moment. Can you get on your feet, can you take a breath first. I know! I don't know what to say except pay something every time you get a paycheck so that she knows you are trying. Maybe you can get through this without causing a rift. It sounds like she has some issues anyway. Sounds like my sister. I don't have much of a relationship with her either. Maybe you should try to put some distance between yourselves if there is always tension and disagreements. Thats how I feel. Everyone always says family is everything but I don't agree. Sometimes family causes alot of pain and you need to distance yourself.