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Old Aug 16, 2013, 09:18 PM
ultramar ultramar is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: Mar 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 1,486
Quote:
Originally Posted by tinyrabbit View Post
I've realised something. I asked myself why I would have no feelings, why would that make sense? My answers: because it wasn't that bad, because I wasn't scared, I had no reason to be scared and I knew nothing really bad would happen.

I realised that doesn't sound like a child's perspective, but an adult's - perhaps imposed on me by my parents leaving no room for my feelings, hence the dissociation. Huh.
But maybe it's not so black and white: either it wasn't so bad, or it was, so dissociated. These things are so, super complicated. Your truth is going to be entirely unique to you, not an imposed bad/not so bad dichotomy from your adult self trying to find something concrete and tangible that may prove elusive. Keep an open mind --maybe the exploration itself is as important a part of the journey and healing as anything else