Hello I am a male with long hair, and really just can't get it to work. It seems whatever I do it just defaults to wild, poofy, and frizzy. Basically it just gives the look that I'm dirty, lazy, and don't care. which is very not true. It is just impossible to make my hair look neat. I am jealous of people who have straighter long hair. It seems no matter how much I wash and condition it, it will always just look dirty. I can tie it up, but I don't enjoy doing that. It's not comfortable. Yet every time I let it down, I'll look in the mirror later and just feel like wow. I looked like THAT all day??? ughh.... I really like having long hair, just not... mine... It usually dies down and deflates after a couple days of no washing, but that's the thing. you have to wash your hair. especially me, because I have severe dandruff and flakes, so if I go even a day or so without washing my hair, my hair will be caked in flakes, which is very very embarrassing to have realized, when you look in the mirror after having been out all day. So it's sort of a catch-22 here. I have to wash my hair to get rid of the flakes, but then my hair will look stringy and gross. I can leave my hair unwashed, but then it will be caked in flakes and dandruff. I don't know what to do! The only times I have actually LIKED my hair are when I got it straightened. those are the few times I actually felt like NO I like my long hair and want to keep it! then once I washed it and the straightness went away, I hated it. So I really don't know what to do. I'd straighten it, but I just can't get myself to do that. It's just a weird masculinity issue I have, I just feel very high-maintenance and image-concerned if I go to the effort to straighten my hair. I don't really know how to explain it, but it would just make me feel weird. this whole hair thing has been severely effecting my self-confidence and desire to go out in public, so it has become a major problem with me. so any tips for shampoos or conditioners or treatments or anything??? thanks!