I would not have as much trouble with what your T said; I think being aware of how others perceive us is very important in our interactions, it's not all about what the other person decides to do that makes one a victim of attack. Unwelcome attention or abuse is not going to happen as much to a self-assured, adult woman, projecting a sense of knowing who she is and what she wants. Acting afraid or "injured" will give any predator; male, female, animal, etc. a sense that one might be easier pickings than a stronger-seeming other?

My T was helpful to me in helping me learn how my past thoughts and actions had contributed to how I was treated by others (not just poorly but well, too; if you are friendly, for example, people will be more open and interested in talking to you whereas when I was too quiet, people often thought I was angry; we have to interact with the environment and let other people know what we would like, what kind of treatment we expect, etc.). Other people cannot read our minds any more than we can read theirs and we have to speak up for ourselves and tell them what we are thinking and feeling so they are not stuck with their own perceptions of us which, if we do not contribute verbally, are inclined to be mostly wrong.

I would be glad to have this opportunity to have a really good conversation with T about what he believes and how he approaches interacting with others (including those looking to abuse/hit on one) and see if I could understand where he is coming from and how it differs from where I'm coming from and what might work better. We cannot know someone is going to choose to hit on us or abuse us so it is not feasible or even possible to "leave" all situations where we think that will happen because our thinking is probably over sensitive. I would like the opportunity to work on my triggers so I did not always feel so threatened, even if it would be hard/painful, rather than keep feeling threatened and having to leave.